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TATE Publishing Release Date April 14th, 2015

Published March 10, 2015 by lavoniartryon

NOT Another Singles Book
So here you are-Single. Still. Again. And the last thing that you want to hear is what you did to cause it, how God isn’t finished with you yet, or how your boo is just around the corner. You want answers to the same questions we all have. Why am I still Single? What’s wrong with me? Why are all my friends getting married, and I can’t even get a +1? WHEN WILL IT BE MY TURN? These questions amongst thousands of others are plaguing your mind and stealing your contentment.
The Answer: There is nothing wrong with you. God has not forgotten you. If we believe that God has a plan for our lives then we must believe that this plan also involves our Single season. There is no way that an Infallible, Sovereign God can orchestrate and ordain your marriage, but just happen to leave out this huge Single segment, as if it is the black hole on your eternity timeline. Singleness is ordained. It is blessed and it is exactly where God has placed you at this moment. Singleness has its season, allow it to be the sweet aroma of a lifestyle submitted to God’s will.
You are complete alone. Easier said than believed and even harder to understand. Your completeness must come from the only One that can offer it to you. You become a walking toxin when you enter a relationship without this knowledge. If you don’t gain completion from Christ before the relationship, you will end up draining every relationship that you are involved. Seeking completion from a mate puts an unnecessary and unbearable weight on the other partner, because you are expecting them to supply you with something only the One who created you can give. If you don’t take the opportunity to get to know ‘you’ while Single, you will poison every relationship and drain the person you are with, trying to get something that only comes from Christ. Getting to know ourselves is work, but really understanding the good, bad and the complicated in your life is something that you can’t afford not to do. Once you recognize your value and in turn, how much you are worth to God, you will stop allowing cheap representatives to waste your time.
NOT Another Singles Book lives up to its name. This hard-hitting, insightful and at times humorous book written by a self-proclaimed Reformed Serial Monogamist will have you throwing away every negative viewpoint you have heard about Singleness and focusing on fulfilling God’s purpose in it. It is a simple, yet eye-opening view of Singleness as something to get into, instead of a grave sentence to get out of. Singleness has a distinct, designed purpose crafted by the Almighty Author of Time, and this book will jumpstart (or assist you in continuing) your journey in discovering the wonderful things God has in store for this season.
God views Singleness as a time of undistracted devotion unto the Lord; a time that the Lover of your soul can romance and woo you. This is the time that the Redeemer of our souls pursues and overtakes us with a love so pure and so sweet that it compares to nothing else, because we will never experience anything else like it. This is the time that God has set apart for you to work wholeheartedly for His kingdom without earthly distractions. If marriage is ordained for you then it will come, why not enjoy the journey?
NOT Another Singles Book challenges you to combat the notion that something is wrong with you, if you are still Single at 20 or 30 or 40. God has not forgotten you. You are not his car keys or his glasses, you are the precious jewel in His crown and He is enthralled with your beauty. The Father gives good gifts to His children and will withhold no good thing from you. If you desire marriage, yet you are still Single, it’s because this is good for you, even when it doesn’t feel good to you. Let’s journey together…

Day 9: Are you the FOOL? Or Just FOOLISH?

Published October 11, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory verse: It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. Galatians 5:1

Psalm 51

Task: Go through your phone and delete those ‘foolish’ numbers- both that make you act the fool and those that are the fool. Post how that it feels to let him or her go.

Have you ever looked up and said how in the world did I get here?!? How did I get into this relationship, and WHY did I stay so long? Why did I allow myself to fall for the same lines again? Maybe just as Aaron Neville said- everyone plays the fool sometimes, there’s no exception to the rule.

Read 2 Samuel 25. This is the story of Abigail, her husband Nabal and her king, David. Looking at her life we are going to determine are we the fool or just foolish and how to get out of the situation. Abigail was an uncommon woman. She was intelligent and beautiful and smart and wise and had discernment. She had it going on. So WHY did she marry THIS FOOL?!?!! She was an uncommon woman in a common situation.

I agree that we can too find ourselves in some foolish situations. We look back and we say: God I should have seen that coming. How could I have been so stupid? We are intelligent uncommon (royal priesthood, chosen nation, fearfully and wonderfully made) people, but we often find ourselves in some foolish situations.

If you know me, I love acronyms. So let’s use the acronym of FOOL to see how we got in and how to get out of foolish situations.

  1. 1.      F- FIGURE OUT HOW YOU GOT IN THE SITUATION

This may be a hard thing to understand and I see it in two perspectives. First Abigail may not have had a choice in her situation. Nabal was rich enough to pay her dowry; he was accepted by her father-for whatever reason so she was married.

Some situations we didn’t get ourselves in, we were called up for them. What does this mean? Job was called up- he didn’t choose his situation he was ordained for it. Jeremiah couldn’t get away from his calling if he tried, and he did try. Mary was summoned to bear Jesus- she didn’t choose to be an unwed teenage mother to the Savior of the world. She was ordained. The Israelites didn’t get lost when they were chased by the Egyptians, God directed them to an impossible, impassible situation in order for the Israelites to see God’s glory. Many of our situations will be the same. We will simply be chosen by God to fulfill His glory.

The next scenario was that Abigail willingly married a fool! Nabal didn’t start being a fool in Chapter 25, he was a fool when she married him, but she still married him. Why? How many times have we willingly walked into a foolish situation as wise individuals? We have attached ourselves to some foolish people, some foolish situations, some foolish relationships both platonic and definitely romantic, but yet we still do it? Why? God only knows…

So now you know how you got there. Maybe we get into that situation because we feel we can change them, we can affect our environment. Is this foolish thinking? NO!! (or at the least, not always) Abigail was in a foolish situation, but she didn’t conform to her environment she changed it.

  1. 2.      O- ORDER YOUR ENVIRONMENT

Verse 14, the servant came to her-NOT NABAL. She was more wise than her husband. She had discernment and order in her household, and everyone knew it, but he was foolish enough to believe that he was running things. She didn’t flaunt this or make a big show- she simply was. She was in what seemed like an unchanging situation, so she decided to change.

So not only did she order her environment, she ordered those in it as well.

She recognized that she needed to cover her husband to save the lives of those connected, but do it in such a way that her husband didn’t know. We will often play the background–families, work, school and we are often overlooked as a group, but we have to recognize that our reward has to come from Christ, because we might not get earthy accolades.

Romans 12:1-2 she renewed her mind. We have to daily do this. She didn’t allow the what she was going through turn her foolish, she remained unconformed (is that a word) to her environment. You have dominion. USE IT.

  1. 3.      O-ORCHESTRATE YOUR EXIT STATEGY

This can be tricky. Jonah wasn’t released until he relented. Your exit strategy must be in the will of God. When she saw the opportunity to act she acted quickly (some versions say AT ONCE-SHE LOST NO TIME) There is a window of opportunity for us on many things, and we have to be ready to act when that happens. Divine guidance only comes to prepared hearts. Because she had spent her entire married life dealing with a harsh man, she had learned how to manage him, so a sensible Godly man was no problem. She learned from her foolish situation.

She used discernment to secure her exit strategy. She reminded David of his commitment to the Lord first, and that the shedding of blood would put guilt on his hands. Then she admonished him to ‘remember her’ when the Lord had exalted him. She was now connected to someone that could get her out of the situation. Who are you connected to that can pull you out? Or are you the only one pulling up and everyone else is pulling you down? Then you haven’t ordered your environment, and might need to find your exit.

She was intelligent and didn’t allow her situation to dull her sensitivity so she was ready to move when it was time.

  1. 4.      L LIVE FOOLISH NO MORE

V 39-41. She got out. How many times do we see an open door but we stay paralyzed to walk through it? I’m reminded of the story of an elephant that was tied to a poll for 6 months where he could only take 2 steps forward, 2 steps back, 2 steps left and 2 steps right. At the end of this time, he was unchained but for the next 6 months he still continued to walk those 2 directional steps. Why? Because he had gotten so used to being stagnant and stationary, that he didn’t even recognize his own freedom. We have been set free, yet we keep dancing the same two step, dating the same guy with a different face, falling for the same girl in a different dress.

Vow to never live foolish again. When Jesus met the woman at the well, her situation changed and she had a choice to go back to her old life, but once she had a taste of God, she couldn’t.

YOU’VE BEEN MADE FREE. DON’T GO BACK!

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