Should you be looking & What you will find: Analysis of Proverbs 18:22

Proverbs 18:22 He who finds a wife finds a good thing and inherits the favor of the Lord.

Now everyone knows this scripture, but have you ever researched it? We have been taught that
this clarifies that THE MAN is supposed to FIND the WIFE, and we use it to justify why a
woman should not be looking for a man. Now on the superficial, this is one interpretation of the
scripture, but it goes so much deeper than just this. Let’s take it word for word:

HE: On first thought, this is thought to mean just a man…But looking deeper this is the same HE
that is used to describe Adam, Joseph and David. This HE (whoso) is not just a male, but this is a
male that has the mental capabilities of love, one that is set financially, emotionally, mentally,
and physically to provide for a wife. The mental capacity to love comes from many sources; but
it DOES NOT come from emotion. If love is only based on emotions, then what happens when
the butterflies fade away? When in the heat of an argument or the throes of lust you forget that
you have made a conscious decision to love another person. If it were merely an emotion, the
divorce rate would be a lot higher. The Hebrew here refers specifically to men who have reached
the mental capacity to love a woman with agape love- as God intended. This is a HE that is
prepared for the responsibility of a wife and a family. The man who separates himself and seeks
wisdom. HE must be ready for the serious and great task of loving a woman as Christ loves the
Church, respecting her and honoring her as the weaker partner. (1 Peter 3:7) This HE is one who
is serving the Lord in full capacity NOW as a single male. From this interpretation, many males
don’t fit the characteristics of the HE, so therefore should not be looking.

That FINDS: Now this word is interesting because it does not take from the definition of the act
of physically searching for something. Even Webster has the right definition: to discover or
perceive after consideration; to come upon by chance; to become aware of, or discover (oneself),
as being in a condition or location. WOW!! This means that IF you are in your lane, seeking the
Lord, then you may happen to come upon, or discover your wife or husband to be, while in your
lane, going in the same direction. Joseph was given his wife. Adam and David likewise did
nothing to deserve their wives. You are directly focused on pursuing God and on the path that he
has set, and when you are in the right location and condition, you may happen upon that
appointed person.

A WIFE: Now this is not just referring to just a female. But this is referring to a woman that is
worthy to be called by such a honorable name. A wife is esteemed, so therefore this label will not
apply to all women. This wife is a jewel of great value, a rare jewel; he has found that one which
will not only contribute more than anything to his comfort in this life, but will forward him in the
way to heaven. This means if you are not praying and serving God now, single- you probably
won’t start magically when you get married. It also refers to taking care of the responsibilities of
the household and fulfilling your wifely roles-cooking, cleaning, caring for the family,e tc. (For
those of you that are all for the Women’s Movement, Liberations, Equal Responsibilities and
Roles-It may work (and should) in the Office World, but has no relevance or authority over
God’s Word. WE STILL HAVE ROLES (Proverbs 31:10-31, Titus 2:4-5, Ephesians 5:22.I Peter
3:1-6) I didn’t write it, I’m just quoting it! This definition also has to do with THE MAN’s

capacity to love that particular woman! “A good wife” is a woman the man recognizes as one
whom he has the mental capacity to love. This is the woman he would protect and honor at all
cost, above everything below God-spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically.

Finds a GOOD THING: Now just because you are a female, and you get married, doesn’t mean
that you will be a ‘good thing.’ In order to meet these qualifications you have to first meet the
criteria of a WIFE. That means you also have to have your stuff together, and not just sitting
around waiting on your life to start when your ‘Boaz’ shows up. To be FOUND, you have to be
traveling in the same direction that HE was traveling-a path directed and ordained for God’s
glory. Proverbs 31:12 She brings him GOOD all the days of his life. So are you living as a good
thing right now? The Hebrew goes on to infer that the only way a man can, through the ultimate
source of his soul, give his mental capacity of love to a woman, is if he recognizes in her, the
ability to respond and accept his love. Women are designed by God to be the responders to a
man’s love.

And inherits the FAVOR of the Lord: This is one of those ‘if, then’ clauses. IF, all the criteria are
met before the ‘comma’, then you will receive the blessings after it. Favor – Granted to her, and
bestowed upon him, not by his own diligence, but by God’s good providence. Meaning that you
can’t sway God’s hand or speed up his timing, but when and if He so sees fit, he will bestow it
upon you.

I pray that you received this as a Word and use it to change your mindset and focus, if you (as I
did) misinterpretated this scripture, or confirmation if this has already been revealed to you.

References: The Hebrew Bible, Pastor Monty Rainey
Excerpt from NOT another Singles Book by La Vonia R. Tryon
Find us on facebook @NOT Another Singles Book

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