All posts for the month October, 2012

DAY 23:Jesus at the center of it all, IN JESUS NAME

Published October 23, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory Verse: Whatever you ask in My Name, I will do it so that the Father may be glorified in the son. If you ask Me anything in My  name, I will do it. John 14: 13-14

(this scripture should look different after today)


Psalm 33

Challenge: AFTER READING THIS NOTE: Seriously pray and read the Word and ask God for a manifested ‘IN JESUS NAME’ statement and share one with us

Jesus at the Center of it all. Jesus, take the wheel. Only through and by Jesus has anything ever been created and by Him it all holds together. IN JESUS NAME. Do we truly know the power of these statements? I think we have only grazed the tip of the iceberg of understanding the Name, much less the person of Jesus. The Bible says that the name of the Lord (remember lowercase ‘ord’ signifies Jesus) is a strong tower (a safe fortress, a defending army, an impenetrable, impassible wall), the righteous run into it and they are saved (protected, raised high, lifted above their circumstances) Proverbs 18:10. So how do you run into a name? A cross-pollinated look at  John 1:1-3 and Genesis 1: opens this scripture mightily for me. Prayerfully the Holy Spirit will do the same for you…

John 1:1-5, In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.  He was with God in the beginning.  Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made.  In him was life, and that life was the light of all mankind.  The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcomeit.

14: The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the one and only Son, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.


In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 2 Now the earth was formless and empty, darkness was over the surface of the deep, and the Spirit of God was hovering over the waters.

3 And God said, “Let there be light,” and there was light.

6 And God said, “Let there be a vault between the waters to separate water from water.”

9And God said, “Let the water under the sky be gathered to one place, and let dry ground appear.” And it was so.

11 Then God said, “Let the land produce vegetation: seed-bearing plants and trees on the land that bear fruit with seed in it, according to their various kinds.” And it was so.

Still don’t see it? Go to our Psalm of today: Psalm 33:6 The heavens were made by the Word of the LORD (big ORD equates God Yahweh) and all the stars, by the breath of His mouth. 9: For He spoke and it came into being; He commanded, and it came into existence.

THE WORD IS JESUS, JESUS IS THE WORD. The spoken, living, breathing and yes, written Word of God is JESUS manifest. God used Jesus to create everything, by SPEAKING HIM over the circumstances and allowing the Word to change it. So how do you run into a name? You got it-You run into the Word.

So that’s why it’s so important to understand that when we pray ‘In Jesus Name’, it means NOTHING, ABSOLUTELY NOTHING if it is not a prayer that is in line and manifested in line with the Word. You can’t pray, Lord send me a Husband, IN JESUS NAME, if the Lord has already spoken to you specifically in Isaiah 54:5 ‘For your Maker is your Husband, the Lord of hosts is His name.’ If God has told you that this isn’t your season of marriage, of moving from a job, of WHATEVER, then you praying ‘In Jesus Name’- is wasting your life-giving breath, and seeking to abuse the power of the Name. I hear and have often prayed selfish, disobedient, flesh-ridden prayers and then put ‘IN JESUS NAME’ on the end, like I was sealing something other than the image of how simple my thoughts are.

You can’t pray in the Word’s name, something that is not found in the Word. It’s a contradiction and God has said ‘God is not man that He shall lie, nor the Son of Man that He shall repent. Does He speak and not act, or promise and not fulfill? Numbers 23:19

God can’t lie, but we can sure lie on Him. Vow never again to say ‘Thus said the Lord’ without feeling conviction or confirmation that this is the character of Jesus, the Living Word. We say alot of things that aren’t manifested in the Word of God, just we expect God to perform it. God is only bound and required to fulfill HIS WORD, not ours.

Re-evaluate your relationship status, whether you are Single, Single and Dating, Single and looking, Engaged, or even Married. Can you say ‘IN JESUS NAME’ and not be lying? This is a hard Word and many won’t receive it, but God’s Word can’t return to Him void, it will do what it has set to accomplish. Those that have ears let them hear. IN JESUS NAME.

DAY 22: You are Good Enough

Published October 23, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory Verse: He did not even spare His own Son, but offered Him up as a ransom for us all; How will He not als

o with Him grant us everything? Romans 8:32

Psalm: 30

Several days in this week will be dedicated to those that feel like they are spiritually, emotionally, physically, financially and any other ‘ally’ that you can think of-ready for marriage, yet the desire for marriage has not been actualized. You’ve been waiting and praying for your ‘one’, but she/he is nowhere to be found. In fact, it’s the opposite. It seems like everyone is getting chosen but you. You may be asking yourself, “How did I get here? Has God forgotten me? What is wrong with me?”

This is a dangerous cycle to get caught in. You will soon get sucked into the green-eyed monster and start comparing yourself to those very people that you call friends. Rest assured, because the devil loves mess and messy people, when you do this, he will always make the scales tip in your favor in the “marriage-material” category.

You will begin to believe that you are more worthy to be married than the other person. Remember Paul warned against this type of boasting in 2 Corinthians 11. When we start to focus on our accomplishments, and how good or “holy” we are, the enemy has succeeded in convincing us to count on our resources rather than our Source.

This is a trick that is literally as old as time and it is still working. Remember the enemy is not always looking

to take you out, especially if you are saved because even he understands to be absent in the body is to be present with the Lord (2 Corinthians 5:8). You are more useful to him if you are ineffective. You become one of his prized possessions when you can cause someone else to stumble. Comparisons are a dangerous game to play because spiritually, you are telling God that you don’t approve of His plan for your life and that you would rather have someone else’s.

So here you are still on the tree, always being passed up while the apples that are on the ground or on the lower branches are being picked so easily; seemingly like they aren’t even trying. Now doubt is setting in. As a woman you start to wonder, “Am I not pretty enough? Is there something wrong with me? Do I not have the right body type or skin tone?” As a man, you may start to believe, “I’m not accomplished enough. I don’t have the right education. I’m too nice. I mean, no one really wants a

coming-up brother anymore, huh?” Change your

perspective; you are approaching this all wrong.

I have heard a popular saying that states “Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the top of the tree. Some men don’t want to reach for the good ones because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt (or even worse, having to put out actual effort to get you). Instead, they pick the ones on the ground, which are easier. The apples at the top may begin to think there is something

wrong with them. But no, you’re amazing! You just have to wait for the right man that realizes you’re worth the climb” (and will ask God for the ladder).

I believe that the truth is not that the apples which have gotten picked are better than you (or less than you for that matter). It’s simply that God saw fit that it was their time. The reason they were picked may be because God knew that the one meant to pick them was on the way. They may have been in the same position you are in: at the top of the tree, seemingly forgotten, asking the same questions you are asking, questioning their value. I encourage you to keep waiting. Whether God supplies a ladder or bends the branches, you will be just in the reach of the one God has chosen when he comes.

Maybe you are still on the tree because you aren’t quite ripe yet. Stay there for a while. Mature on the Vine as you grow stronger. When it’s your time, there is no way that you will get passed over. Remember the view is better from the top. Use it to your advantage to weed out those who aren’t strong enough to make it to the top to get you.

If you long for emotional intimacy, I challenge you to find it in God. A man or woman may complement you, but the King of kings is enthralled by your beauty (Psalm 45:11). You may question if a mate loves you at all times, but you should never doubt that God has loved you with an everlasting love; that He has drawn you to Himself with loving-kindness (Jeremiah 31:3).

Even in marriage vows, the epitome of an earthly commitment, the most a person can commit to another is, “Until death do us part.” But I love what Paul says: “I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:38-39).

The entire book of Song of Solomon is about the beauty of a woman that didn’t think she deserved the affections of a King, and his patient kindness in assuring her over and over again, that she was indeed good enough. In Chapter 1 she is concerned that her dark skin disqualifies her from being beautiful, but in Chapter  2 her King brings her to the royal banquet hall in front of everyone and places a banner of love over her-His public declaration to her is the same declaration that He is making over you:


DAY 21: Are you the one or should I wait for another?

Published October 21, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory Verse: Beware of false prophets (suitors) that come to you in sheep’s clothing (Gucci and Hugo Boss, smelling all good) but inwardly are raging wolves (only out for your goodies or to steal your favor). You’ll recognize them by their fruit. Are grapes gathered from thorn bushes or figs from thistles. (Sooner or later their true nature will come to surface) Matthew 7:15-16 as interpreted by me

Psalm 23

Challenge: What characteristics are necessary to determine whether this person is ‘the one’? What do you have to see or hear?


THE ELUSIVE ONE. I’ve spoken with many Christians and some believe that there is ‘that one’ person that they are destined to be with and that is it for them. Others believe that at different points in your life you may be more compatible with different people, so there is maybe an ordained person for each season and you choose them by whether you are ready to be married. Both opinions are valid and I believe that they can work together. I believe that there is a person ordained for you, but I also believe in free will, so I believe your ordained person can choose to be disobedient and marry someone else—then where does that leave you? Single forever unless you choose to marry someone else too? I don’t think so. I believe that just as God raised Joshua to replace Moses and David to replace Saul-He can and will raise up another for you, ordained to complete your joint purpose.

But that’s not what this day is about. It’s about recognizing ‘the one’. How will you know if this is the one that God kept for you or if it is just another suitor that carries similar qualities that you are looking for? I believe a story in Luke involving Jesus and John the Baptist will give us key clues to recognize him or her when they come.

In Luke 7 and Matthew 11, John is in prison for the cause of Christ and he sends two of his messengers that are with him to ask Jesus ‘Are you the One who is to come or should we look for someone else?’. Jesus’ response is surprising here. He didn’t say, ‘I am the Christ, or ‘My Father and I are One’ or anything that would confirm His identity and deity. He simply challenged the disciples to go report what they had heard and seen. Apparently, John’s disciples were with Jesus during many of His miracles because Luke 7:18 says that John’s disciples told him (John) about all these things. So Jesus challenged them to go back to John and assure him, not through what Jesus said but what He DID. ‘The lame walk, the blind see, the captives have been set free, those once diseased are now made whole.’ From these signs, John the Baptist as well as his disciples could draw their own conclusions, but there could only be one logical answer: He is the Messiah.

What Jesus challenged them to do, I am challenging you to do. What have you seen in and heard from this potential suitor? Has she/he changed your circumstances for the better? Do they pray over and with you and things change? Can they lead you to the throne of Christ? Do they wash you, teach you the Word? These are things that should be evident in any Christian that is contemplating sharing their lives, earthly possessions and vision with another? WHAT HAVE YOU SEEN?

There should be an outward manifestation of certain characteristics. John the Baptist had himself baptized Jesus into His ministry and saw the Spirit of God descend on Him, but yet He still had doubts. You will too, and they will be valid. Sharing your life with someone is so much more than just guilt free sex and a shared last name. This is serious and it shouldn’t be entered into lightly. While John was suffering, He needed confirmation. During your difficult times in relationships, that person’s actions should confirm their identity as ‘the one’.

Actions speak louder than words. What do you see? What have you heard? The answer to your question if he or she is the one, lies in your response to these two preceding questions.

DAY 20: What being Single has taught me about Getting Married

Published October 21, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory verse: I charge you daughters of Jerusalem, Do not awaken love before it’s time. Song of Solomon 8:4

Psalm 130

Challenge: What are some single perks that you aren’t quite ready to give up for marriage?

This Challenge will be short and (somewhat) sweet. I’ve determined that this may be a bit self-centered, but I have also determined that I’m ok with that.

What being Single has taught me about getting married is that: I LOVE BEING SINGLE RIGHT NOW!!!

I really do. Unashamed, uninhibited and most importantly unattached. Now don’t get me wrong, I believe that when I get married I will LOVE being married, but I’m not there right now. I am more than ok with that. There is a certain freedom with being Single that is a luxury not afforded to marriage, as Paul speaks about in 1 Corinthians 7 willingly and as Jeremiah was commanded in Jeremiah 2. We have the freedom and liberty to not check in- USE IT! I have many friends that are married or seriously dating and before we make a last minute decision about a late night dinner, or going on a day trip to the San Marcos outlets- they have to call their significant other-not necessarily to ask for permission, but just to inform them that they will be late home or unavailable for the day. I call….my bank to make sure I can shop the way I want to? My mom just in case I have a blowout on the freeway so someone knows where I am (and sometimes not even then)? Some Singles see this as a sore spot to not have someone to check in with. NOT.ME. I realize everyone may not relate to this post, but I believe there is a remnant that will 😉

Recently I met a guy that was determined to take me out. He was local delivery truck driver so he worked pretty standard shifts and informed me that when he gets off around 6 or so, he is free every evening, so the date was up to me. I was shocked and a bit turned off, I must admit. ‘You mean, you get off work and just go home? And do what? Watch tv, play PlayStation?’ I couldn’t understand that. Where is your vision, your goals, your life and why aren’t you busy working on them? I NEVER have days when I just come home and watch TV. I fit one into my schedule about once every 2-3 weeks just to keep my sanity, but even then I’m reading or working on my next 3 books. So, needless to say he couldn’t understand when I couldn’t ‘work him into’ my schedule as readily as he could me. Between my part-time job, my two businesses, my book(s), speaking engagements, Singles ministry and sorority- my days are pretty packed-so going to dinner and a movie with a guy that I might or might not be slightly interested in, is pretty low on the totem pole.

Maybe some of this comes from the residual effects of being engaged to an insecure, unsure of himself man. Yep, I was engaged-read the book (shameless plug). He wanted to know where I was going and who with. I felt obligated to keep him informed in decisions of my life, and I was no longer at liberty to be as free as I would like. This is not to say that every relationship will be or should be this way, but every relationship does have a level of responsibility to make decisions or at least include your significant other in them. Right now, I am rather enjoying my level of responsibility to…. me and God.

DAY 19: Too Close for (or due to) comfort: Stop playing with the line

Published October 19, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory Verse: I have hidden your Word inside my Heart so that I might not sin against you Psalm 119:11

Psalm 76

Challenge: Think about that ‘line’ that you have been manipulating. Write it out and commit to pray over it specifically for the remainder of this challenge, asking God to give you strategies to resist it.

Read Judges 13-16 for the story of Samson. Use this as background for today’s challenge. We often talk about Samson just in light of Delilah and we will get to her, but I want to start before that. Samson was a  Nazarite- he was instructed not to drink alcoholic beverages, to not touch anything unclean, and never to cut his hair as a show of his vow with God. These three chapters are so full and rich (might be another book 😉 but I just want to touch a few components. The Bible records Samson breaking at least 2 out of 3 of these vows, before the covenant with God was broken.

Why did Samson do it? Was he not aware of the guidelines of his vow? Did he forget in the heat of the moment? I doubt it. I think Samson had gotten used to playing with the line. What does this mean? Samson was an Old Testament manifestation of Paul’s admonishment in Romans 6:1, ‘Shall we continue in sin so that grace may abound? Surely NOT!’ Samson had gotten used to breaking the covenant with the Lord with no ‘noticeable’ consequences, so he kept doing it. He first married a Philistine woman when up to this point, they were forbidden to intermarry with non-believers of the True God (Exodus 34:12-16). Then he killed a lion with his bare hands and on his journey back home, he ate honey from the dead carcass. Then gave some to his parents without informing them where it was taken from forcing them (especially his mother because she had been commanded not to eat anything unclean in chapter 13), to participate in his sin with him. Next, he slept with a prostitute, which was defiling his temple. Then, finally since he had gone this far- he told Delilah the final vow that would break the covenant with the Lord that he had yet to break. And lo and behold, she used it against him. For money.

This could be a lesson about Samson’s poor choices in relationships, but I want to talk about him playing with the line. Samson had ‘gotten away’ with sin for so long that he had begun to be insensitive to the Holy Spirit and stirrings of God. As you read the chapters, when Samson participated in sin, the spirit of God was not resting on him. What does this mean applicably? I believe we can allow unchecked and un-repented sin to separate us from hearing from God. We allow it to dull our spiritual ears and the quickening of the Holy Spirit (what others call conscience), so that we no longer call sin what it is…SIN. Samson had eaten from a dead carcass and nothing naturally happened. He slept with a prostitute and nothing naturally happened. So he was getting away with sin, right?! WRONG!! We must understand that when something naturally manifests on earth that it has already manifested spiritually (Thy Kingdom come, The Will be done, on Earth as it is in Heaven). It has already happened spiritually. Each time Samson sinned, I believed he spiritually weakened and quenched the Holy Spirit’s control on him a bit more.

How often do we do this? Play with that line until determining what is permissible and beneficial is blurred, or continuing in a sin until we get ‘caught’?

We have to more concerned with the spiritual consequences of sin-SEPERATION FROM GOD- then the natural consequences that we may or may not experience, due only to grace. Samson should have learned from his 1st wife that women would be his downfall, because she was lured away from him by money. His weakness was a pretty face, and unchecked it brought him to his ruin. With his wife and Delilah he gave in due to their nagging and begging. He told them both his secrets and they used it against him. In the first scenario, God’s grace extended to him and Samson was not consumed.

But he did it again. WHY?!?!? Because many of us don’t learn from grace, we are only taught by justice. We are not spiritually sensitive enough to understand that grace is getting what we don’t deserve and mercy is not getting what we do. We never attribute God’s mercy in not allowing a physical consequence to manifest, we foolishly think we have gotten away with something. So we keep doing it. We get closer and closer to the line, until we don’t even know when we have crossed it.

Samson first told Delilah things that had no resemblance to the truth- the fresh ropes and bowstrings—in order to appease her. Now, PAUSE. Samson if you see that everything you tell her, she does to subdue you, why do you KEEP telling her? Why do you stay with her? Obviously she doesn’t have your best interest at heart. Just stupid. But don’t judge him too much, you have stupid moments too. Dating a guy that not only doesn’t respect your vow of chastity, he doesn’t even believe it-so he keeps pushing the boundary. And you continue to let him. Or you date a woman that has no respect for you or your vision with no intention of ever submitting to you nor ‘help’ing you ‘meet’ ANYTHING-but you keep her around because all your boys are amazed that you pulled someone that looks like her. Hollow, shallow, flesh-serving desires- LORD HELP US.

Samson then starts playing with fire. He tells her that his strength has something to do with his hair. TOO CLOSE SAMSON!!! You are getting too loose with your anointing. In 2012, this is manifested in those late night movie sessions, heavy kissing and making out, spending excessive time alone, when you have vowed to keep what rightfully belongs to your spouse sacred until your wedding day. Now you are tainting it. You are seeing how close you can get, instead of being focused on how pure you can stay. It was only a matter of time before Samson told her the truth, once he had gotten this close to it. And it’s only a matter of time before your clothes come off, once you have played with this line so much.

Learn from Samson’s life-don’t repeat it. Mercy is not a ‘get out of sin free card’, it is a by-pass so that you can get it right the next time. It’s God way of giving us another chance to prove to Him that our commitment is not based on outward manifestations but grounded in inward convictions.

Draw the line in every area- and commit to stay as far away from it as possible.


Published October 18, 2012 by lavoniartryon


Memory Verse: A prudent person sees trouble coming and ducks; a simpleton walks in blindly and is clobbered. Proverb 22:3

Psalm 17

Challenge: Think back to your last, a past relationship or even a potential suitor . What were some warning signs that this person might not have been/might not be ‘the one’ but you ignored them?


I’ve often heard the phrase, love is blind but marriage is a real eye opener. Of course, we Singles laugh at this (or at least this Single used to), but I don’t think we fully grasp what this means to a person in that situation. What I take from this statement is that, when you are busy falling in love and thinking this person’s dirty laundry doesn’t even stink, you are unaware of all the things that you should be taking notice of. So as a result, you get in a committed relationship with a person, or even a marriage before you really get to know the nature of the person. This translates into those long crying sessions with your girlfriends or those intense basketball games with your boys-discussing how they are no longer the person you married or first met. I don’t believe this is completely true, I believe that IS the person you married, you just dated the representative and didn’t bother or was too ‘in the love bubble’ to dig deeper.

My previous Pastor used to say when you date you should have both eyes wide open, wear glasses, use a magnifying glass and a black light, and then when you decide to marry this person-close one eye and dim the lights. What does this mean? That the dating stage should be the time that you acknowledge those red flags or those discrepancies in the person, then when you decide to marry them you don’t nag about the things that you tolerated while you were courting. Before you decide to spend the rest of your life with a person, you should burst the love bubble (we will talk about this next week) and really discuss things from the perspective that once you walk down the aisle, you can’t turn back around and run up it, because you didn’t know he had 60,000 of debt or that she doesn’t know how nor have a desire to submit.

Those essential things that you aren’t seeing in the mate should be addressed. Never simply think that they will get better when you get married. They might get worse, because now you have to share everything with this person and what used to irritate you only on Monday, Wednesday and weekends, will be making your living conditions miserable every night of the week.

This message isn’t meant to say that a man or woman has to be perfect to earn your affections, just that you shouldn’t be so casual and careless with who you give them away to. Snoring isn’t a deal-breaker, but jealousy or insecurity might be. You see what I mean?

The TSA now has this slogan that you will see all around the airport ‘See Something, Say Something’. This campaign is admonishing travelers to be aware of their surroundings and don’t simply dismiss something that could be suspect, thinking it’s nothing. That nothing could be the bomb that changes your life. Same scenario but in a relationship. That ‘something’ that you keep looking over and dismissing might be the thing that puts additional strain on that relationship and eventually breaks it.

SEE SOMETHING. SAY SOMETHING. Everything shouldn’t be an issue, but some things should be. Choose wisely, and determine go into every relationship with your eyes (not just your nose) wide open. If Samson would have done this, his fate would have been very different. We will discuss his particular foolishness tomorrow.

My friend has a saying ‘Everyone has their own brand of crazy, you just have to find the person whose crazy is compatible with yours.’ True statement, truer application.

Day 17: Upgrade You(rself)

Published October 17, 2012 by lavoniartryon

Memory Verse: So God created man and woman in His own image; He created him in the image of God; he created them male and female. Genesis 1: 27

Psalm 45

Ok, I don’t listen to alot of Beyonce. Nothing personal, because I-like other people that either idolize or hate her, don’t know her personally- I’m just not a big fan. BUT-when UPGRADE U came out, I used to go in on this song. GO.IN. Not necessarily because of what she was saying, but the message that she was shooting for. The message that-with me I would add to your life, make your purpose easier, assist you in all endeavors. The message that-there are some things that will be unlocked just by me being by your side. That’s real and that’s a word. Let’s explore some of her lyrics. Now if you take out some (ok, most) of the superficial behind the song- her motive reminds me of another woman I read about…check this.

Don’t doubt yourself trust me you need me
U need a real woman in ur life(That’s a good look)

a]A wife of noble character who can find?
She is worth far more than rubies.

Taking care of home and still fly(That’s a good look)

22 She makes coverings for her bed;
she is clothed in fine linen and purple.

27 She watches over the affairs of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.

And I’ma help u build up ur account (That’s a good look)

24 She makes linen garments and sells them,
and supplies the merchants with sashes. 

(But ladies that’s a good look)Believe me
When ur in those big meetings for the mils(That’s a good look)

U take me just to compliment the deal(That’s a good look)

25 She is clothed with strength and dignity;
she can laugh at the days to come.
26 She speaks with wisdom,
and faithful instruction is on her tongue.

And anything u cop I split the bill(That’s a good look, better yet a hood look)

16 She considers a field and buys it;
out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.

I can do for u what Martin did for the people

20 She opens her arms to the poor
and extends her hands to the needy.

Ran by the man but the women keep the tempo

23 Her husband is respected at the city gate,
where he takes his seat among the elders of the land. 

It’s very seldom that ur blessed to find ur equal

Still play my part and let u take the lead role, believe me
I’ll follow, this could be easy
I’ll be the help whenever u need me

I see ur hustle, with my hustle I can keep u

11 Her husband has full confidence in her
and lacks nothing of value.
12 She brings him good, not harm,
all the days of her life.

Focused on ur focus, I can feed u

15 She gets up while it is still night;
she provides food for her family
and portions for her female servants.

Just when u think u had it all
Picture ur life elevated with me

28 Her children arise and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women do noble things,
but you surpass them all.”

It’s the little glimpse of light

That makes the diamond really shine
30 Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Honor her for all that her hands have done,
and let her works bring her praise at the city gate.

 Now see my heart behind this. I believe that there is something locked inside of every man that is ordained to get married, that only the ordained ‘helpmeet’ can unlock. Which means 2 things.

1. As a woman, we have to make sure we bring something to the table, and not just sit at it, looking all pretty. Remember verse 30 Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised. Oh, best believe you are fly Beautiful Woman of Virtue, but you must have character, drive, business savvy, intuition, a desire to see your mate and your household blessed, because in return YOU will be blessed. These are innate traits that your husband needs you to embody to help him reach the purpose that God calls you both to. In Proverbs 18:22, God says ‘A man who finds a wife finds a good thing and obtains favor from the Lord. Just getting married, does not qualify you for the esteemed title of wife. Nor do you become a good thing ONCE you are found- you were already one, your husband’s eyes are just just become a good thing when you are found. You are already a good thing, your husband’s eyes are just now opened to see it. Stop calling yourself a Proverbs 31 woman when you KNOW you only embody about 8 of those 21 scriptures. Be honest with yourself…say I got verses 12,13, 20, and 24 down, I’m still being perfected into the others… lol, no but seriously.

2.   As a man, you have to have something for her to help you ‘meet’. She is called your helpmeet for a reason, but if you haven’t taken the time to figure out your purpose, what is she helping you meet? Nothing…exactly. Being the head is much more than just being a male. Chromosomes make you a male, Character makes you a man. There’s a difference. You don’t just wake up one day knowing how to lead, protect, provide, care for, or spiritually, financially, emotionally and mentally cover your family. That takes work and time and dedication and humility to admit that you don’t know how to do it, and wisdom to find a man that does and go sit at his feet. There is no strength in struggling to be a leader but not asking for help. You can’t say you want a Proverbs 31 woman, when you aren’t embodying the Genesis 2 man. Adam had a purpose, a plan AND a house before God gave him Eve. He had intimate communion with God, a direct line of communication, he had ambition, drive, creativity, leadership-DOMINION. What are you ruling over? A Queen needs a King and a King needs a Kingdom. To sit at the city gates, means that he is an elder of the land- a leader. You gotta come up (and stay up) if you are trying to ‘find’ that good thing.

Let’s upgrade ourselves so we can upgrade each other.

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